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Day of the Warrior (Andy Sidaris, 1996)
Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in. Except, "they" aren't The Mob (or the D-Mob, for you all acid heads out there) or The Church of Satan (or The Church of Extacy, for all you acid...
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The Immoral Three (Doris Wishman, 1975)
Whoever decided to give the three characters at the centre of The Immoral Three names that all end in 'y' is going to feel my wrath someday. Oh, and don't worry, I'm not blaming Doris Wishman, as she...
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Cabaret Sin (Philip O'Toole, 1987)
Since no one living in 1980s could have foreseen what the world was going to look like in, say, forty or fifty years, there was only one thing the people in-charge of depicting the future for...
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Return to Savage Beach (1998)
My critical knives were just itching to cut into the bloated carcass that is Return to Savage Beach (a.k.a. L.E.T.H.A.L. Ladies: Return to Savage Beach) for having so many freakin' endings, when, all...
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A Smell of Honey, a Swallow of Brine! (Byron Mabe, 1966)
Five individuals in A Smell of Honey, a Swallow of Brine! (An Adult Experience!!!) are initially given the go ahead to enter her primary passageway using the appendage of their choice, only to be told...
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Exorcism (Jess Franco, 1975)
This has to be some sort of world record. Maybe someone who has seen more Jess Franco films than I have can enlighten me, but this particular movie has Lina Romay's outstretched vagina onscreen in...
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Beneath the Valley of the Ultra-Vixens (Russ Meyer, 1979)
It always used to take me a couple of tries whenever I attempted to write out Kitten Natividad's name. It's not the "Kitten" part that threw me, it was that thing lurking between "Nat" and "Dad." (You...
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Father's Day (Astron-6, 2011)
You're watching a low budget, high concept cinematic love letter to incest, unorthodox chainsaw usage, daddy rape, transvestism, maple syrup, cock-based cannibalism, taint rearranging synth flourishes...
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The Taming of Rebecca (Phil Prince, 1982)
Nowadays, your average serial killer has to worry about the authorities poking around their hard drives looking for "unseemly" material after they're eventual arrested. But back in the 1980s, the...
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The Brick Dollhouse (Tony Martinez, 1967)
Do you like boys? Do you like to get high? Do like nude parties? Do you like orgies? If you answered yes to all of these questions, than you'll feel right at home with the sophisticated ladies who...
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How to Seduce a Virgin (Jess Franco, 1974)
Somewhere near the middle of Jess Franco's How to Seduce a Virgin (a.k.a. Plaisir à trois), I thought to myself: Hmm, if Lina Romay's character continues to wear the same black, do-it-yourself hold-up...
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Nymphs (Anonymous) (Manuel Conde, 1968)
In my non-award winning review of the hippie-era non-classic, The Brick Dollhouse (shot in eyeball compromising colour), you might recall that I stated that I fully intended to seek out more films by...
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Femmes de Sade (Alex de Renzy, 1976)
Normally, I would gradually work my way to the scene I'm about to describe. But I can't stop thinking about it. Meaning, I'm afraid I'm going to have to write about it now. I hope you don't mind. Okay,...
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Hobo with a Shotgun (Jason Eisener, 2011)
There I was, sitting on my pathetic excuse for a couch, watching Hobo with a Shotgun with a mild (nothing to write home about) smirk on my face. When, all of a sudden, something exceedingly awesome...
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National Lampoon's Last Resort (Rafal Zielinski, 1994)
Here's a film that features the winsome Maureen Flannigan (7th Heaven) cavorting about in a tropical paradise in a plethora of slit-heavy sarongs and boasts the ever effulgent Demetra Hampton (Red Shoe...
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Secret Mistress (Lasse Braun, 1986)
Shot on video, yet filmed in New York City, Lasse Braun's Secret Mistress is a bit of an odd bird for those very reasons. On the one hand, the use of videotape instead of film gives the entire...
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Slashers (Maurice Devereaux, 2001)
When I first saw the annoyed expression Sarah Joslyn Crowder sports near the beginning of Slashers (スラッシャーズ), I thought to myself: There's no way her pretty little face is going to be able keep up...
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Gator Bait (Beverly Sebastian, 1974)
If you're easily offended by the sight of sickly perverts who get their kicks by openly pontificating about the sight of Claudia Jennings in cut-off jean shorts, you better clear on out of here,...
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Beneath the Valley of the Ultra-Vixens (Russ Meyer, 1979)
It always used to take me a couple of tries whenever I attempted to write out Kitten Natividad's name. It's not the "Kitten" part that threw me, it was that thing lurking between "Nat" and "Dad." (You...
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Pink Flamingos (John Waters, 1972)
You probably wouldn't come to this conclusion by looking at it from a pedestrian point-of-view. However, if you were to say switch to a more cockeyed point-of-view, you would definitely agree with me...
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